Symbolic Offering

My coven and I underwent a journeying ritual last Tuesday. It’s a sacred ritual involving guided meditation. The prep was meditation, tarot readings and some serious self-care of he soul variety for a few weeks. Very peaceful. Very powerful.

Part of this journeying ritual was to present an offering or a sum of what no longer serves us. Mine was a copy of my brother’s death certificate. On the backside, I hand wrote this poem I came up with while working a week prior. Before the start of the ritual, I held that piece of paper and cried. I cried out his name and kept telling him how much I missed him. Tears filled the pages and I imagined them imbuing with the words; pieces of me.

Then, I sat with my feelings and suddenly stopped crying. While crying is therapeutic, I felt an overwhelming sense of clarity.

What is a death certificate, anyway? Does it sum up a person’s accomplishments, their dreams, the people who love them? Does it showcase their entirety?

Of course not. As I sat there in the silence, I thought of a few things I’ve been telling myself to calm down:

  • I can’t change what happened no matter how much I think about it.
  • My family and his friends tried to help him several times.
  • We loved him no matter what-and still do.
  • I have to live and take better care of myself-for both him and me.

If you’re grieving or have grieved: did you have a ah-ha moment or a moment of clarity where certain things made sense?

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